This one’s for all you pathetic losers with small cocks, who will never get a girlfriend. It’s time you start making your own dating life. That’s right, you’re going to go to the store and buying yourself a girlfriend. There are so many choices. Lifeguard hotties, big bootie Latinas and Asian firecrackers just to name a few. Just go to the back wall of the adult toystore and pick out the girl of your choice. So what if she’s full of hot air? So what if she doesn’t talk much? You’re still going to treat her like the doll that she is.
For starters, you’re going to take her out shopping. Blow her up and seatbelt her into the passenger seat of that loser-mobile. Remember to take the HOV lane. Make sure you cover up all her pink parts. You don’t want to get a ticket for indecent exposure. Now take her to the mall with you and pick out a sexy outfit. You need to dress your girl in style. Remember that if you get a Fatty Patty you’re going to have to shop at Big Girls Boutique and if you get a Paris Love doll, she will probably bitch-slap you if you try to bring her into Kmart. If you get the Goo Gobblin Granny Love Doll you’d better get her a sweater for chilly nights. You don’t want those hard nipples poking you in the thigh.
Once you’ve dressed her up, it’s time to take her out for a night on the town. Start with dinner for two at a very nice restaurant. Don’t worry, she won’t eat much, and she’ll probably ask for a doggie bag. Then it’s off to the movies where you will be a gentleman and let her pick the chick-flick she wants to watch. Make sure you sit up close so she can see and put your arm around her and whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Let her hold the popcorn in between her legs.
After a long night of cockteasing, she might even let you cum.
Bonus Humiliation Points:
If you go into the fitting room and help her try on that sexy lingerie: 5 points.
If you take her out for a whirl on the dance floor: 10 points.
If you pick the Lil Ho Peep with the sheep doll: 15 points.
If you pick the Tranny Doll and discover that her cock is bigger than yours: 20 points.
If your new girl cuckolds you with a guy who has a real cock: 25 points.
If you call me and tell me about your date: 1 point per minute
If you call me while you’re in public on your date to tell me what a good little cocksucker she is: 2 points per minute
If you call me and one of my Mistress friends and let us play Empress Sez with you and your new blow-up fem domme: 3 points per minute
For an erotic phone session with Empress Jasmine, call 800-601-6975
Must be 18+ to call
Calls are $2.50 per minute with a 10 minute minimum
Discreetly billed to a major credit card
